This blog series is a fun crossover between How to Break an Evil Curse by Laura Morrison and The Black Pearl by Jennifer Flath. You can read both novels for free at JukePop Serials.
This episode is the conclusion to the 7-part story/interview extravaganza where Alexander tries to get to the bottom of what's going on in Fritillary. Start with Part 1 here or catch up on what you missed!
Warren opened up a bag he had over his shoulder and reached in. “I’ve got this vial of raven blood. It’s magic. It talks. And--well, hold on a second. I’ll explain.” He took out a vial of blood and set it carefully on his lap, then pulled out an empty vial. He poured some of the contents of the full vial into the empty one and handed it to me.
“What does it do?” I asked, not sure about the social custom of sharing blood in vials.
“So, I can have it deliver messages to you. It’ll talk in your head. Don’t let it scare you when that happens. It’s really super friendly.”
I wasn’t sure I wanted a vial of telepathic bird blood, but I thanked him anyway.
“Hopefully I’ll be contacting you soon.” Warren sighed.
“I hope so, too,” I said, examining the vial of thick, red liquid against the light. “I’m sorry you’re apart.” I was genuinely sorry. I had quite a soft spot for separated lovers.
“You have any experience with this kind of thing?” Warren asked.
“Well…” I wasn’t sure I wanted to talk about me, but this line of thinking had me surprisingly homesick for someone who had been home that morning. “My Rin and I haven’t always had the easiest path, both literally and figuratively.”
“Love is the worst,” he said. His banjo tune, which had been going on this whole time, got melancholy.
“Oh, no,” I disagreed. “How can you say that?”
“Well, Lola was my only girlfriend ever. Then I realized I loved Julianna and that I’d been an idiot, but by then it was too late and she was gone. And she left still thinking I was with Lola. So there’s that.”
He was an idiot, but just a confused one. Anyone who had been influenced by Lola’s vision of love had an uphill battle to enduring happiness. “Just to clarify, even after you were conscious, you continued to date...Lola…” Yuck. “For a length of time? The lady who told me the secret to relationships was living in a state of constant jealousy?”
I was so far off track with my social research, I was drawing swirls on the margins of my paper.
Warren cringed, and nodded. “Yeah. I did date her for a while after my concussion was done. It was pity dating toward the end though. Not sure if that makes me sound better or worse. I have a problem with being too nice sometimes. I think the problem was that I thought going into it that we were meant to be. So ignored the million or so warning signs.”
“Meant to be?”
“She was cursed, and I was the counter-curse. Specifically, if we fell in love the curse would break. I never stopped to consider that the person who made the curse was an idiot who didn’t know much about real love. The idea of that guy being able to be the means by which two people found real, true love is laughable in retrospect. Except I’m not laughing.”
“It sounds like someday, you’ll have quite a story to tell,” I mused. “Your life sounds like a twisted fairy tale.”
“That’s a very positive spin on things,” Warren said. “Maybe Copper will write it for me.”
“Have you committed many crimes along the way?” I had to ask. “I think his literary skillset may be fairly narrow.”
“Hmm. No. I’m pretty law-abiding,” he said. Then he added, “Oh, wait. Well, I did help Julianna knock out the whole royal family one time. And I helped her escape from the dungeon. And I broke and entered a place and stole some blood and magic ingredients. And I broke into the Forest of Looming Death--not really a crime since they let me in, but it felt criminal since we were on the run and they were soldiers guarding the place… I guess I should say I never committed any crimes until I left the pirate ship.”
“I wish I had more time to hear this story in order,” I said. “Copper may be able to help you after all. My only advice is to stay away from Lola, stay away from anyone who wants to turn you into a small rodent or reptile, and find your Princess as soon as possible. You do plan to tell this Julianna everything, don’t you?”
“Oh yes. No question. There’s no way I’m not telling her everything. I’m not a fan of uncertain relationships. Lola and I differ in that. Not to drag her up again. I just really want Julianna to know the truth, whether she’s on the same page or not.”
“You should probably write that down,” I suggested. “In case your impaired judgment kicks in at the wrong moment. How long is that going to last, anyway?”
“That’s a good question. I’m not sure if anyone knows.” He paused, then said, “Hey, you had questions. Right? I don’t want to bog you down with all my love troubles if you don’t want.”
“It’s no trouble. You’re the first person who hasn’t threatened my life or tried to read me poetry.”
“Aw that’s a shame. Some poetry’s so bad. You should have had Copper read you some of my sister’s stuff. Now that is good poetry,” Warren said. “Hey, Copper threatened your life?”
“He’s very menacing,” I lied, well, half-truthed. Copper was very menacing. One shouldn’t mock another’s sister’s (supposed) talents.
“Totally. He used to be a thug before he was a writer. He actually sorta kidnapped Julianna once. Almost.”
“He’d like to know you’re ok,” I said, wishing Copper had listened to me, because this would have been the perfect opening to reveal he was outside. “Maybe you could send a message to your sister? Sisters worry. Worry makes them hurt you more when you see them again.”
Warren winced. “Yeah. Shoot. Yeah, I see what you’re saying I guess. Let me just take a few deep breaths here and try to compose myself. I tend to lose my judgement easiest when I’m stressed.”
“I’ll just go tell him you’re willing to chat?” I said, pushing the issue before Warren could back out. I opened the door and in tumbled Copper.
“Really?” I said. “I was just defending you.”
Copper said from his spot on the floor, “Yeah I heard! Thanks, man. That was cool of you.” Then he looked up at Warren, who was staring down at him with horror. “Warren! Dude, your sister is so worried! Why are you doing this to her?”
Warren spluttered incoherently, then jumped to his feet, raising his banjo above his head like a club. I grabbed the source of his livelihood from his hands just in time. Warren took a series of forced deep breaths and muttered to himself, “Calm down, Warren. Calm down. Good decisions, Warren. Just the good ones.”
“You know,” I said, “this might be one of those situations where family could help you out, Warren. They seem to care, and you could use someone looking out for you. I mean, unless they’re actively trying to kill you, which is a subject where I have more expertise than I’d rather.”
Warren clenched his fists and glared at me. His eyes had a crazy sort of look in them. “You said you’d come alone. You didn’t. And now you’re trying to get me to go home?” He began to rummage through a bag he wore over his shoulder. “Hold this a second, will you?” he asked Copper, handing him the bag.
“Uh, sure…” Copper said. “Why? What’s--” he stopped short when he saw the two vials Warren had taken out of his bag. “Oh! Oh no! Don’t--”
Copper lunged. I would have lunged as well, but I was holding a banjo. Just then my head was filled with a croaking voice that said Bro! If he’s doing what I think he is, make sure that vial of blood doesn’t get cracked! It’s me!
“Who said--?” I started, realizing halfway through that I could answer my own question.
Warren mixed the contents of the vials together before Copper could reach him. A thick, suffocating smoke filled the room. I heard the door open then slam shut. Then everything went dark.
I groaned, rubbed my aching head, and opened my eyes. Rin, Issabeth, and Pepper peered down at me. The unmistakable white walls of Crystal Palace shone down on me, and I was glad to be home. Part of my gladness might have been due to the beautiful black-haired woman who covered me in kisses.
“You’re lucky we didn’t pull you out a long time ago, brother,” said Issabeth, pinching my arm.
“Ah, you were watching?” said I. “Then I am surprised you let me fight a pirate.”
Issabeth giggled. “That was because Rin refused to watch, but I enjoyed it. She wanted to rescue you from Lola a few times.”
“Horrible woman,” Rin agreed. “Sorry we didn’t get you before the sleeping spell.”
She had nestled herself against my chest, which could only be true love because I smelled like grime, fish, cheap alcohol, and the ubiquitous asparagus.
“Here, Izz,” I said. “I have a book for you.” I tossed her the questionable poetry book.
“You know how I feel about poetry,” she said, “but I do know someone who is fun to torture with poetry. So, thanks.”
“Are you and Cedric speaking nowadays?”
“Speaking...torturing with juvenile poetry...the line is gray,” she said.
“Speaking of,” said Rin. “The Enchanters wanted a report on the new land as soon as you returned.
“I need a bath and time to figure out if I learned anything at all,” I complained.
“I can help with that,” Rin said.
“Which?” I teased. She kissed me. I forgot both objectives.
“I am right here,” Issabeth complained. “Standing right here.”
“I can fix that,” I told her. I pulled out the vial. “Take this to Athena. Tell her it’s talking blood from Fritillary.”
Dude. What the heck. Just handing me off to whoever you please as if I don’t have a mind of my own?
“I’m sorry,” I apologized. “Vial of bird blood, Sorceress Issabeth. Izbit, vial of bird blood.”
Oh fine. Hello, then. And it’s raven blood. Not bird blood.
Issabeth nearly dropped the vial and exclaimed, “Did you hear that?”
“It sounded like a squawking bird introducing itself,” said Rin. “What is a raven?”
You can hear me? the raven blood squawked.
“Of course,” Rin answered. “How can blood speak?”
But--but--people can only hear me when I let them, bro.
“I’m very sorry,” Rin apologized. “Would you rather I pretend not to hear you?”
No… no… it’s cool. Just kinda weird. It’ll take some getting used to is all. You seem cool. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone you’re a witch.
“I don’t think it’s a secret that I can use magic,” Rin laughed. “Even when I tried to deny it, everyone around me could still tell.”
So you’re on the run then? Mobs with torches and pitchforks? Could you make sure you keep me wrapped in some sort of padded material, dude?
“No mobs lately. Just kings and queens with their demands and half-true promises,” she said. “I’m sure Athena will know how to take good care of you.”
I could help you eavesdrop on those kings and queens if ya want.
“Thanks, but one resident secret-uncovering expert is enough for me.”
“More than enough,” I added. “Let me know if Warren finds his Princess. I’m invested now.”
Will do, bro. But don’t hold your breath. The kid’s not the best at adventures, especially all by himself.
“He’s got a good reason,” I said, smiling at mine. “Things will work out.”
Thank you for reading! If you have any questions for characters from How to Break an Evil Curse or The Black Pearl (or the authors), please leave them in the comments.